Nutrition Facts
Plain Cheerios don’t taste great. They are, however, full of vitamins and minerals. Pound for pound, plain cheerios have more iron than steak and more fiber than spinach. Enjoyable or not, they’re worth something. I imagine plain cheerios eras are worth something as well.
I’ve compiled a list of vitamins and nutrients (in the form of lessons learned) that I think my plain cheerios era is fortified with. I’m not a food scientist but I think it’s alright:
Patience: Better takes time
That is ok, fancy cheeses take years to age. I probably don’t need to have everything figured out in 6 months. If I had a nickel for every time I thought “I should be over this” or “Anybody else would’ve figured this out by now” I would have at least enough nickels to buy a nice pair of running shoes (at full price!).
It’s been almost 7 months (not that I’m counting) since the heart attack and the first time I was able to put the topic to rest for any substantial amount of time was two weekends ago on our anniversary trip.
Making cheese is a long, sometimes stinky process so is becoming human. Being “better” has taken longer than I’d like, but I think we’re getting somewhere.
Connection: Eating plain Cheerios is better together.
Because I had a heart attack, Emily is eating plain cheerios too. I wouldn’t have chosen to put her through this, but the experience and aftermath have brought us closer together
Writing about these experiences has also given me a chance to connect with people I otherwise wouldn’t. People are willing to share with me the plain cheerios moments in their lives they wouldn’t normally share.
Not everybody wants to eat plain cheerios in front of an audience, nor should they, but I think some amount of sharing helps. I appreciate the moments where, because I made my cheerios accessible, someone finds enough connection to share their bowl with me. I hope this lightens their load.
I’m not saying you should chew with your mouth open but I’m realizing sometimes you don’t have to eat your cheerios by yourself and that when the cheerios come out, it’s great to have someone to share the bowl with.
Kindness: Taking care of someone else’s problems often fixes your own
The other benefit of eating plain cheerios with Emily is I have someone to think about besides myself. When it gets hard my problems melt away as I listen to hers. When I shift focus from what I can’t do, to what we can do together I’m a happier man.
I might not be doing a long run but I sure can shop for fall décor and art supplies at Hobby Lobby. We might not be racing together but we sure can get Biggie Bags and talk about life at Wendy’s.
I do not claim to be good at this. It’s tricky but sometimes the way to make plain cheerios taste better is to make someone else brownies.
Humor: Eating plain Cheerios can be ridiculous, funny, and messy.
I still have moments where the absurd reality of this situation takes me by surprise. The circumstances are no less ridiculous now than they were before. I still don’t have a family history, I’m still way too young, I still exercise more than most people I know, and we haven’t made some grand discovery that explains it all. Sometimes I’m mad, but often all I can manage is to laugh.
What I really wish I could do was cry. We have a running joke at our house; every time Emily tears up about something, I say: “Can I have some?”. In the hospital everything was too crazy to cry. I fully expected to come home, find a quiet moment, and bawl my eyes out, and move on. Seven months later, I’m still waiting for that moment.
I had a funny dream the other night where I was swimming laps at the university pool (something I’ve not done in years). My kindergarten teacher came to the edge of the pool and asked me how things were going. A flood of emotion washed over my dream self so I shoved my face into the pool and thought: “Cry as many tears, as fast as you can, into the water. Then nobody will be able to tell”. I felt a high-pressure stream of water shoot out my tear ducts for a few seconds until all the tears and emotion were gone. Then I took my head out of the water and finished the conversation. I wonder if my subconscious is trying to tell me something.
Gratitude: A little gratitude goes a long way, further than yourself.
I will admit, towards the beginning of this experience, I had a hard time finding things to be grateful for. With time and practice I’m improving:
I count myself lucky to be able to run at all. Forty miles a week is a lot more than zero.
They might take longer than I want but I’ve got access to some very good doctors.
We have (for now…) access to really good health insurance which all but eliminated the enormous financial burden that could’ve come with this event.
Lately there are so many beautiful Fall mornings. The leaves have put on quite a show. It seems the clouds have also been doing their best to paint the most beautiful skies.
I’m married to a wonderful girl who’s willing to take me on the maximum-allowable-distance run every day so I don’t miss out on any running I could be doing.
My family and friends are willing to run with me.
I’ve made so many wonderful human connections and exposed myself to new opportunities.
Just making this short list I can feel my soul lighten. I’ve also noticed the more I focus on finding gratitude the happier Emily is and the easier it is for me to do things for others. I guess gratitude is contagious.
Vitamin K: Kind words and a good groove can turn the day around.
I’ve had enough rough days to have plenty of rough days turn around. The other day work was draining, I was particularly aware of the long weeks between now and my next set of appointments, and the things I wished I could be doing were front-of-mind.
I went to the gym, hopped on the treadmill for a slower-than-desired jog, and popped in a headphone. I listened to a talk and hit shuffle on Spotify. King Harvest’s Dancing in the Moonlight was next in the queue. By the end of the song, I was a different person.
I’m not saying it will solve all your problems, but some positive words and a good jam sure can make them go away for a while. If you want a place to start, here’s a list of songs to turn your day around:
- Dancing in the moonlight – King Harvest (or the cover by Toploader)
- You make me feel like dancing – Leo Sayer
- Let’s Groove – Earth Wind and Fire
- Rocky Mountain High, Sunshine On My Shoulders, Homegrown Tomatoes – John Denver
- Send Me on My Way – Rusted Root
- Green Onions – Booker T & the M.G.s (no, there are not words)
- Drift Away – Dobie gray (or Uncle Kracker)
- Dancing with Myself – Billy Idol
- Dance, Dance, Dance – Steve Miller Band
- Hey Jude – The Beatles
I’d love to know what you would add to this list.
Vitamin L: Hold on to what you’ve learned.
My mom always has good advice for tough times. One of her favorites is a quote:
“You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometime you’ll find
You get what you need”
– Mick Jagger
That’s held true in the past. I’m holding on to that one real tight right now.
munch munch munch…
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